Living Longer: Getting Over Grief

The longer we live, the more likely we are to experience the grief of passing loved ones. We may even have to deal with the death of a spouse. Grief can be physically and mentally debilitating. The pain will feel unbearable for most us. That is why it’s important to be aware of the grieving process and the best ways to take care of ourselves during this time.

What are the stages of grief?

WebMD outlines the stages of grief as such:

 

Denial: When you first learn of a loss, it’s normal to think, “This isn’t happening.” You may feel shocked or numb. This is a temporary way to deal with the rush of overwhelming emotion. It’s a defense mechanism.

Anger: As reality sets in, you’re faced with the pain of your loss. You may feel frustrated and helpless. These feelings later turn into anger. You might direct it toward other people, a higher power, or life in general. To be angry with a loved one who died and left you alone is natural, too.

Bargaining: During this stage, you dwell on what you could’ve done to prevent the loss. Common thoughts are “If only…” and “What if…” You may also try to strike a deal with a higher power.

Depression: Sadness sets in as you begin to understand the loss and its effect on your life. Signs of depression include crying, sleep issues, and a decreased appetite. You may feel overwhelmed, regretful, and lonely.

Acceptance: In this final stage of grief, you accept the reality of your loss. It can’t be changed. Although you still feel sad, you’re able to start moving forward with your life.

How to Get Through Grief

There is no escaping grief. Trying to ignore it or drown it out will only postpone healing and could lead to mental health issues. Mental Health America recommends the following advice:

Seek out caring people. Find relatives and friends who can understand your feelings of loss. Join support groups with others who are experiencing similar losses.

Express your feelings. Tell others how you are feeling; it will help you to work through the grieving process.

Take care of your health. Maintain regular contact with your family physician and be sure to eat well and get plenty of rest. Be aware of the danger of developing a dependence on medication or alcohol to deal with your grief.

Accept that life is for the living. It takes effort to begin to live again in the present and not dwell on the past.

Postpone major life changes. Try to hold off on making any major changes. You should give yourself time to adjust to your loss.

Be patient. It can take months or even years to absorb a major loss and accept your changed life.

Seek outside help when necessary. If your grief seems like it is too much to bear, seek professional assistance to help work through your grief. It’s a sign of strength, not weakness, to seek help.

Grief is a part of life. Everyone will have to experience it. It helps to be aware of the stages you will go through and accept the fact that you might mourn for months or years. Prepare for the stages of grief, take care of yourself, and seek out professional help if needed.

What has been your experience with grief?

What has helped you cope?

Visit the Online Grief Support Forum.

*********

And never forget – A Smile Changes Everything!

Brigitte

7 Books that Will Keep You Younger

Are you ready to live longer? It’s never too late to start enjoying a healthier, more fulfilling life. Learn brain exercises, financial wisdom, and lifestyles that will reset your genes with these seven books on aging from the bestsellers list on Amazon.

51O4LhD6AYL._SX328_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

1. The Blue Zones, Second Edition: 9 Lessons for Living Longer From the People Who’ve Lived the Longest

Region by region, Buettner reveals the “secrets” of longevity through stories of his travels and interviews with some of the most remarkable–and happily long-living people on the planet. It’s not coincidence that the way they eat, interact with each other, shed stress, heal themselves, avoid disease, and view their world yield them more good years of life. Buettner’s easy to follow “best practices” and list of healthy lifestyle choices from the Blue Zones will empower readers to live longer, healthier, more fulfilling lives.

51Gd1ONz3+L._SX390_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

2. 399 Games, Puzzles & Trivia Challenges Specially Designed to Keep Your Brain Young.

Based on the science that shows that people middle-aged or older who solve word games and brainteasers have a significant cognitive advantage over those who do not, 399 Games, Puzzles & Trivia Challenges is the illustrated game book specifically created to cross-train the brain. Here are 399 games to stretch, challenge, and push the reader, all of which stimulate the formation of neurons—literally, regrowing the brain.

51q8EDhJDyL._SX403_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

3. Aging Backwards: Reverse the Aging Process and Look 10 Years Younger in 30 Minutes a Day

The body is programmed to self-destruct as we age, but the speed at which it self-destructs is up to us. Recent scientific studies have proven this fact! In Aging Backwards, Miranda Esmonde-White offers a groundbreaking guide on how to maintain and repair our cells, through scientifically designed workouts.

Healthy cells prevent joint pain, muscle loss and weak bones—helping to control weight, increase energy, and improve strength and mobility. Miranda offers readers of all ages the tools they need to look and feel young. Complete with tips, tools, and her Eight Basic Age-Reversing Workouts accompanied by instructional photos and web clips, Aging Backwards will help you grow younger, not older!

51Y1MfFUvKL._SX318_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

4. Younger Next Year: Live Strong, Fit, and Sexy – Until You’re 80 and Beyond

Both men and women can become functionally younger every year for the next five to ten years, then continue to live with newfound vitality and pleasure deep into our 80s and beyond.

51RDT0lEsJL._SX342_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

5. How to Retire Happy, Wild, and Free: Retirement Wisdom That You Won’t Get from Your Financial Advisor

World-class author and innovator Ernie J. Zelinski guides you to:

  • Gain courage to take early retirement; in fact, the earlier the better.
  • Put money in proper perspective so that you don’t need a million dollars to retire.
  • Generate purpose in your retirement life with meaningful creative pursuits.
  • Follow your dreams instead of someone else’s.
  • Take charge of your mental, physical, and spiritual health.
  • Better envision you retirement goals — including where you want to live.
  • Above all, make you retirement years the best time of your life.

41vuNvpa-XL._SX322_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

This book is written for you…
  • If you want to thrive and find spiritual strength, wellbeing, wisdom, and wonder as you grow older.
  • If you are willing to recognize that we live in a new period of history where we can live longer and with more vitality than people ever have.
  • If you are ready to embrace this new reality and live the fourth quarter of your life creatively, lovingly, and joyfully.

 

51R2PL1MY7L._SX330_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

7. Younger: A Breakthrough Program to Reset Your Genes, Reverse Aging, and Turn Back the Clock 10 Years

The scientific reality is that 90 percent of the signs of aging and disease are caused by lifestyle choices, not your genes. In other words, you have the capability to overcome and transform your genetic history and tendencies. Harvard/MIT—trained physician Sara Gottfried, M.D. has created a revolutionary 7-week program that empowers us to make the critical choices necessary to not just look young, but also feel young.

Have you read any of these books on aging?

Which one would you recommend?

*********

And never forget – A Smile Changes Everything!

Brigitte

Vitamins and Herbal Supplements – Waste of Money or Healthy Habit?

Vitamins and herbal formulas are a multi-billion dollar industry. Natural remedies for memory, energy, weight loss, joint pain, and even libido abound. Everyone is looking for the Holy Grail, but is it necessary to take vitamins for longevity and do herbal formulas even work?

VITAMINS

Most doctors will tell you that calcium and Vitamin D are necessary to ward off osteoporosis. Folate is crucial to prevent birth defects. B vitamins give an undeniable boost of energy. But studies have also found that the typical multivitamin may not extend life or fight disease. A healthy diet should be enough to give all the body all the needed nutrients.

HERBAL AND NATURAL SUPPLEMENTS

Herbal remedies were human beings’ first medicine. Chamomile, ginseng, echinacea are among the most commonly used herbs. So are fish oil, garlic, ginkgo biloba, and glucosamine. But most supplements have not been studied thoroughly enough and have no guaranteed effect. Other herbal compounds could interfere with medication and exacerbate health problems. Even though herbs seem like harmless leaves, roots, and flowers, don’t experiment with any herbs until you’ve spoken to your doctor.

IT’S UP TO YOU

Most of the claims in made by supplement manufacturers cannot be corroborated by the FDA. This doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t work. They may just not have been tested for such a use. You’ll find people who swear by certain supplements. So, if you want to try the latest remedy for low energy, sagging skin, or aching knees, what have you got to lose? Just make sure there are no possible risks or interactions first.

 

Do you believe vitamins make a difference?

What’s your favorite herbal supplement?

Share below!

*********

And never forget – A Smile Changes Everything!

Brigitte

Loving the Sun? – But Your Eyes Don’t?

As much as we worship the sun, the sun is not our best friend – especially not while we get older and our eyes get more sensitive – luckily sunglasses come to the rescue. But more than a protection they have become an important fashion accessories and therefore, change with fashion trends, which means buying a new pair often – like every summer. However, beware of cheap ones. The twelve-dollar version, or the ones sold by street vendors don’t look as good as a pair that costs thirty dollars or more, or is a designer’s latest model. Cheap glasses lack refinement, styling and finish, and they don’t stand up to daily wear and tear. The lenses scratch so easily that you soon think you’ve had them for years.

Clean your sunglasses often. They should be shiny and sparkling – dull lenses detract from their appeal. And to get the best shine make a paste from talcum powder (baby powder) and water. Rub the glasses – not just the lenses also the frames – with this paste, rinse and polish – and voila – like new.

And in the event you wear prescription glasses, you might consider getting transition glasses, also called photochromic lenses which become sunglasses when in the sun. A few years ago my optometrist suggested it and it works very well – besides it gives me an excuse to bring my glasses up-to-date more often.

                                                                   ************

And never forget – A Smile Changes Everything!

Brigitte