Take a Taxi – Don’t Walk

Believing that even sad events can teach us something I want to share the upsetting news that hit me this week. Filled with sadness I realized that it was a kind of wake-up call. A wake-up call, not just for me, but it should be for every older person who has been told – and we hear this advice very often – be careful how much money you spend because you don’t want to outlive your money.

A scary thought for sure, but how can we be certain it is not our money that out lives us?

No, nobody knows how long we are here and what the future holds. And keeping this in mind we should be more generouss with ourselves! Don’t deprive yourself – buy that new dress – take that trip – go out for dinner with your friends – take a taxi if the bus doesn’t come – do whatever makes your daily life more enjoyable without feeling guilty. And saying this I know that most of us won’t go overboard, but we do deserve a few extra treats.

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When I got the sad news, and before I could accept the reality, I was sitting again with my friend Joan on her porch during the long weekend I had spent with her just a month ago. Her laughter, her joie de vivre was infectious. She was telling me how she looked forward to her trip to Turkey in September, and had some funny stories about her skiing trip to Whistler, B.C. with her grandson. and that she was going on a hiking trip to the  Adirondack next week. Kayaking was part of her like life too, boundless energy.  We had a busy, physically demanding weekend with parties, time on the beach, walks and debates about life. Her life looked like it had a long way to go; she was only in her early 70s. With her unshakeable optimism she told me that now, being partly retired, she was looking forward to ticking of items on her bucket list one by one.

It was not meant to be – Joan died last week.

 

 

….and all her dreams and hopes for the future are being buried with her today.

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Writing this and remembering the way she was always ready to help others I feel like she leaves us with a message which I want to pass on by telling you a little anecdote

A friend of mine asked her father on his deathbed if he had any regrets about his life and he answered: “Yes, I regret that I didn’t take more taxis!”

Don’t let the taxis in your life pass you by  — instead take the ride while you can.

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Joan – may the angels enjoy your laughter as much as I did.

Brigitte

 

 

 

Getting the most for your buck!

scan0004-2The other day when I was putting on my favorite black pants, and one of the four sweaters I wear all the time, finishing it with a duffel coat I have worn all winter, it occurred to me that I wear these items all the time. Then I asked myself why? The answer was easy – because I feel very comfortable in them – because I look good in them – because they stand up to wear and tear.   They are like old faithful friends, and I can always rely on them to make my day. The reason? I bought the best quality I could afford.

No, it doesn’t mean we have to buy designer clothes, those are for the rich and famous. But it means choosing between a discount store – yes, I know they carry brands too, but often they are the items they could not sell elsewhere, the rejects – and a higher priced department store, like a Neiman Marcus, Lord & Taylor, or a boutique in your neighborhood.

If you have a  budget, and who doesn’t, you will buy less by buying better,  One advantage here is your wardrobe will be less crowded- and the other advantage is that you won’t have to think so long what to wear, because when you buy better, everything looks good on you.

It is an adjustment to pay $89 for a top instead of $29 but the extra $60 will earn their keep so to speak, over and over by making you feel and look good.

We are still in the beginning of the New Year – could that be one of your New Year’s resolutions? Please let me know, or if  you have a question – leave a comment here and  I will be in touch with you.

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And always remember – A Smile Changed Everything!

bn-small-imageBrigitte

 

 

 

    

FEAR – DON’T LET IT SPOIL THE MOMENT

This week I attended a meeting of the TheRadicalAgeMovement held at the Ethical Culture Society of NY.

There were close to 100 men and women, anywhere from 60 to 80+++. and one of the topics was “What do you fear the most about getting old?”

The discussion went on for the next three hours, and here are some of the major concerns,

  • that I outlive my money
  • that I will be incapacitated
  • that I will be alone
  • that nobody will take care of me
  • that I am not part of the world any longer
  • that I can’t travel anymore
  • that my friends have all died
  • that I can’t take care of myself

These fears, all of them, or some of them, I think cross every older person’s mind at one time or another. But we must not allow it to take over our life. One woman said,

“I can hardly sleep when I think of my finances?”

“May I ask you if you are having financial difficulties now? I asked.

“No, my accountant says I will not outlive my money. But I can’t stop worrying because one never knows what might happen.”

No, one doesn’t. But let’s stop and think! Isn’t this is true for any situation in life, and at any age? – you never know what might happen?  And haven’t we all heard that worrying changes nothing? Realizing this we should not let an unknown future spoil our today!

I know from my experience that whatever happens in life, life goes on and solutions are found. So maybe now it’s time to smell the flowers (sorry for the cliché) instead of worrying about how they will look when they are wilted.IMG_4003 IMG_2007 IMG_3368

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And never forget – A Smile Changes Everything

Brigitte